Tale of the Tweets

New York Gets Jack’d! 24 Season Premiere Live Diary – Part II

Posted on January 18, 2010. Filed under: General, Tale of the Tweets, Television, TiVo | Tags: , , , , , |

Welcome back! It’s time for Part II of my epic 24 Season 8 premiere live blog. In case you missed Part I from last night (which covered 4:00 pm – 6:00 pm), you can check it out right here.

When we last left off, we had tallied a total body count of nine through the first two hours (nine in the first hour, zero in the second).

Here’s our cast of characters so far: In addition to “I’ve got a plane to catch” Jack Bauer, Chloe O’Brian and President A. Taylor (the A stands for Awesome), we met:

  • CTU Agent Fembot (Dana Walsh) who has a secret trailer trash past and is engaged to…
  • CTU Agent Freddie Prinze Jr.
  • NYC Director Hastings (I don’t have a nickname for him yet) UPDATE: WE HAVE A NICKNAME: CTU Chief Bubba Hunch
  • A new presidential chief of staff who may or may not be trustworthy (no nickname yet)
  • Arlo the incompetent or idiotic CTU analyst (who may or may not be a mole)
  • Level 1 Bad Guy (aka Horace Goodspeed and Triumph the Insult Comic Dog) who appears to be leading a conspiracy to assassinate…
  • President Omar Hassan of generic Islamic nation (aka Slumdog Millionaire Who Wants To Be a Millionaire Host), in town to sign a landmark peace treaty
  • President Slumdog Millionaire has been interviewed by and appears to be having dirty western thoughts about the journalist Meredith Reed (aka Jessica Stein)
  • Jessica Stein may or may not be just a decoy in the plot to assassinate President Slumdog Millionaire or actually involved.

So here we go with my live diary/would-be Tale of the Tweets for Part Two of the premiere of Day Eight of 24. Let’s get to the ass-kicking and body count, shall we? (more…)

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New York Gets Jack’d! 24 Season Premiere Live Diary – Part I

Posted on January 18, 2010. Filed under: Tale of the Tweets, Television, TiVo | Tags: , , , , , , , , |

I decided not to live-tweet the two part/two night/four hour premiere of the 8th season of 24 because I wanted to be fully focused.  24 requires complete and undivided attention, especially as they set up the season. Which takes place in New York City! But as the premiere unfolded, I realized I had so much snark to share. And that I have a blog. So if sharing snark about 24 isn’t what the blog is for, I don’t know why I bother.

New York Gets Jack'd! (photo from tvfanatic.com)

So here we go with my live diary/would-be Tale of the Tweets for Part One of the premiere of Day Eight of 24. Let’s get to the ass-kicking and body count, shall we?

The following takes place between the hours of 4:00 p.m. and 5:00 p.m.

Events occur in real time.

Disclaimer: the time-stamping is approximate. My TiVo time is not quite in sync with the official 24 clock, so there’s a 2 minute margin of error.

4:01: Hey! Not everybody in NYC is a crack addict. #stereotyping

4:02: Two minutes in and the body count is already at two. This is going to be a good season.

4:04: Jack’s granddaughter is a real cutie. I sure hope she doesn’t get caught up in this nonsense.

4:05: So they use fake Fox News on a Fox show so they don’t want people to see how ridiculous the real thing is?

4:05: Oh Kim Bauer. I forgot how much you annoy me.

Anil Kapoor: game show host to president

4:07: The actor who played the host of Who Wants to Be a Millionaire in Slumdog Millionaire is the president of Iran, er, Kamistan, er, generic Islamic nation.

4:07: But the actor who plays him is Indian. Oh, nevermind.

4:07: It’s 24. Racial profiling is not only standard, it’s expected.

4:08: President Taylor is made of awesome.

4:16: Jennifer Westfeldt lives with John Hamm. Isn’t that enough? Now she must have the president of Kamistan as well?

4:18: Hassan’s brother seems like a real tool. I’m sure that won’t be a factor either.

4:21: 21 minutes in and Jack pulls his first awesome move of the season.

4:21: “You’re lucky I’m retired.” Jack Bauer. Bad ass.

4:22: Ooh. CTU has fancy new digs in NYC. Our tax dollars hard at work.

4:22: Another engaged couple at CTU? There will never be another Tony and Michelle!

4:22: Perimeter!

4:23: Oh blonde woman you did NOT just talk patronizingly to Chloe O’Brian.

4:24: Why won’t people learn to listen to Jack Bauer?

4:24: I love how Jack pulls the same “Don’t make me go to the president” move every season.

4:25: CTU director Hastings: “Gather com and tactical. Tell them we’ve got a situation.” *giggles* Jersey Shore is EVERYWHERE!

4:26: “Who is Jack Bauer?” Arlo is clearly an idiot. And that might turn out to be relevant later. Just a hunch.

4:34: Ooh, the president got a divorce! Over Olivia. And the murder she paid for. And that’s that.

4:36: Ethan’s popping pills. That won’t be relevant later.

4:36: Jack to Kim: “Something came up. Gonna be at little late.” Understatements of the year.

4:37: Hmm…the Baccarat store is located at 59th and Madison. Let’s see. That’s approximately NOWHERE NEAR 18th and 9th.

4:38: Having trouble buying into the concept that Chloe is having trouble with technology.

4:38: Chloe is the modern-era greek chorus. Speak the truth, girl!

4:39: Agent Freddie Prinze Jr. Not really buying it.

Freddie Prinze Jr. as CTU agent. Interesting. (photo courtesy fusedfilm.com)

4:40: Oh no, damn good samaritan calling the police. Don’t you know it’s Jack Bauer?

4:41: The Magic Satchel! It’s back!

4:45: Oh damn. Mrs. Hassan looks like a cold bitch.

4:46: Hassan’s daughter seems like a good kid. I hope she doesn’t get caught up in all this nonsense.

4:47: Fun fact: President Omar Hassan Ahmad al-Bashir is the real president of Sudan. I learned that when I googled “President Omar Hassan.”

4:48: New Chief of Staff. Trustworthy? Too soon to tell. (Man, I’ve clearly watched waaaaay too much 24).

4:49: Why do they make the NYPD seem like incompetent idiots?

4:49: Listen to Jack Bauer, dammit.

4:49: Two NYPD cops down. Body count now at four.

4:50: “Mr. Hastings, we have a situation at the pickup.” Situations everywhere.

4:51: And the award for best use of a firefighter’s axe as an improvised murder weapon goes to…Jack Bauer!!!!!!!

4:51:: Two bad guys down. Body count now stands at six in the first hour. Nice work.

4:52: Holy fucking shit. What the hell was that? Explosion. Jaw drops.

4:53: Give me a name! Who’s on the inside? Haven’t we heard this before?

4:53: Of course Victor dies before he can give Jack the name of who is on the inside. Otherwise the show would be called 8.

4:54: Two CTU agents and informant dead in the explosion. Body count at 9 after first hour.

4:55: I knew Jessica Stein could not be trusted!

And that’s a wrap on the first hour. Body count total stands at 9.

Let’s see what unfolds next.

The following takes place between 5:00 p.m. and 6:00 p.m.

5:02: Arlo. Arlo is not to be trusted! Or just really incompetent. Too soon to tell. But there’s always a mole at CTU. Always.

5:02: Dying declarations FTW!

5:03: I didn’t know they knew how to pronounce nuclear on Fox. Well done.

Jessica Stein cannot be trusted! (photo courtesy buddytv.com)

5:09: So they got Jessica Stein. That was a little too easy. Somehow I think there’s more to this plot.

5:14: And Chloe just said exactly what I said! You’ll have to trust me on that.

5:16: “I promise I won’t be long. I’ll have to meet you at the airport.” Oh Jack why must you lie to Kim?

5:17: “We’re coming to pick you up at CTU.” File under Bad Idea Jeans.

5:19: Chloe and Jack! Together again.

5:20: Why do presidents hire their brothers to be their chiefs of staff, etc.? Younger less successful brothers always have it in for older successful brothers on TV.

5:23: Aha! It’s the brother! I knew it! Told you he was a total tool.

5;24: The Level 1 Bad Guy’s accent sounds just like Triumph the Insult Comic Dog!

5:27: So I had to google Katee Sackhoff. I’m sorry, BSG fans, I never watched.

5:28: If Dana Walsh has a secret past and a former identity, how did CTU miss that on their oh-so-thorough security clearances? Guess I’ll have suspend my disbelief. Again.

5:31: Why don’t they listen to Jack Bauer? Can I program that as an auto-correct?

5:33: Chloe is right. Jack has asked her to do some crazy-ass shit over the years. I mean, days. I mean, hours. Whatever, you know what I’m saying.

Who knew Triumph would make a cameo?

5:34: Kim Bauer pleads with her father. And we have Kim Bauer to thank for this entire season of 24. I’m not sure if I’m ok with that.

5:35: Gratuitous shot of the adorable granddaughter Teri. Man I hope she doesn’t get caught up in this mess.

5:36: HD is not kind to a lot of the cast members on 24.

5:37: Jack is back! We now resume to our regularly scheduled ass-kicking.

5:41: Them’s some really fancy digs at CTU NYC. I wonder where it’s located.

5:42: President Hassan: “If the price for peace is my life, so be it. Now, who wants to be a millionaire????” Oh, that’s not what he said? I must be hearing things.

5:43: The brother has that long hair, is short and is totally sketchy. I can’t believe his brother doesn’t see it?

5:45: Chloe’s hair looks great. And they even gave her decent clothes and a pretty necklace for this season.

5:46: Katee Sackhoff looks sort of like a fembot. A trailer trash fembot!

Katee Sackhoff as Dana Walsh, fembot CTU agent (courtesy of http://www.aceshowbiz.com

5:46: So if this slimy Kevin Wade found out who Dana really is, how did CTU miss this on her background check? Oh right, suspension of disbelief.

5:48: Really? If I had Sprint I could get access to a sneak peek of next week’s 24? Yeah, I’ll stick with Verizon thanks. Unless I get an iPhone. But I digress.

5:52: Jessica Stein had direct phone contact with someone at the end of the first hour. Was it just her editor at the newspaper or someone more sinister? When is she going to mention this?

5:53: So the Level 1 Bad Guy who launched an assault missile and took out the CTU chopper is pretending to be a police officer from Queens? Awesome!

5:53: Corollary: how did he land a job with the NYPD and on the UN Security Detail if he’s a foreign national? Suspension of disbelief.

5:55: Oh yeah, Jack Bauer’s gone rogue. Game on, bitches.

5:56: Not Jack Bauer’s Magic Satchel! They took his Magic Satchel!

5:57: Oh he dropped President Taylor’s name again!

5:58: Thank god Jack got his Magic Satchel back. All is right with the world.

5:59: OMG. Triumph the Insult Comic Dog just pulled a gun on the nice policeman and his wife.

5:59: “Tear off a strip and put it over Maggie’s mouth. Do it. For me to poop on!”

And finally:

And since my rule is no previews, I will see you tomorrow night for Part II.

Total body count after the first two hours stands at nine.

Let me know your thoughts via comment or tweet.

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Jets-Bengals with my Dad: The Tale of the Tweets

Posted on January 10, 2010. Filed under: Comedy, Family, Football, Sports, Tale of the Tweets | Tags: , , , , , |

As many of you know, I extended my stay in LA for another few days largely so I could watch football with my Dad (and see my adorable nephew Sam). I have always been a daddy’s girl and my love of sports (and sense of humor) definitely comes from him. He’s awesome and hilarious and I love watching games with him. Since I live 3000 miles away, we don’t get to do it too often, so I wanted to take advantage of some prime playoff-watching with him yesterday.

It’s been a while since I’ve done a Tale of the Tweets post, and yesterday’s Jets-Bengals wild card playoff game provided some outstanding material. I mean, with the #announcerfail and #coachingfail running rampant, how could we lose?  Without further ado, here we go:

Tom Hammond is the picture of #announcerfail

Sticking with my gut and going with the Jets.

I really really hope that doesn’t happen. Really. RT @joshqpublic: i really really really hope the jets get crushed today. really. really.

So what players went to Notre Dame or were in the Olympics? Tom Hammond knows those guys. #notannflannouncer

Tom Hammond quoting Ochocinco: “Please, child.” #tomhammondfail

The Oregon State? Ok, that was funny Ochocinco.

Wowowowowowowowowowow! Jets defense!!!!!!!!

That was a fumble. I know you need to challenge, but it will be lost.

OMG. Sanchez completed a pass! He is competent. OMG.

Joe Theisman just said Buddy Ryan would challenge. Yet another #announcerfail. Can we make that a trending topic?

We would be better off watching this game on mute. #announcerfail

Please don’t let this game come down to the Jets’ punter. And what happened to him?

Can someone please explain how Carson Palmer and Mark Sanchez went to high school together? Carson is like 8 years older.

That was an emphatic catch signal from the official. You shouldn’t challenge that.

On dear god I forgot about how terrible Braylon Edwards is. #jets

“You can’t win the game when you drop touchdown passes.” Ladies and gentlemen, my dad.

Tiki Barber: you are just terrible. This is just epic #announcerfail.

Tom Hammond: “Cotchery calls for a fair catch.” My dad: “No he didn’t!” #announcerfail

The Who is rightfully making its first Super Bowl halftime appearance ever. #becausetheyarenotrelevant

I just seriously stood up and screamed, “I love Shonn Greene!” #jets

Awww. RT @dwag29: I would rather read commentary on Jets-Bengals by @amandarykoff and her dad than listen to these jokers. #announcerfail

“WHAAAAAAAAAT???????” Me and my dad on that “illegal contact” call. #officiatingfail

BTW, Carson Palmer is also a pretty boy from Southern California. #justsaying

WELCOME TO REVIS ISLAND!!!!!!

Consider this everyone’s formal introduction to Darrelle Shavar Revis.

Mark Sanchez is a liability and can’t pass. #liesliesdamnlies

Dad: “I would challenge that. Oh, wait. HAH!”

RT @dwag29: Tom Hammond: “And he’s ridden out of bounds! ❤ second pause> No, touchdown!” #channelingchipcaray #jets #bengals #nflplayoffs

For the record, my dad really didn’t know about Darrelle Revis. He lives in LA. They don’t get many Jets games.

#announcerfail RT @ChetRazzball: Hah! RT @NFLFanHouse: THAT WASN’T BRAD SMITH, YOU IDIOTS! #theismannistheworst

NBC only has an “F” announcing team. #announcerfail

Dad: “I seem to recall that Neil O’Donnell got a huge free agent deal w/someone and was a complete flop.” Me: “Yes, the Jets.”

Flag flies. “Holding.” In unison. #daddysgirl

You know, the Bengals don’t have a good history when it comes to injuries in playoff games.

RT @dwag29: Halftime already? These announcers are just getting warmed up! Let’s trend #announcerfail in the 2nd half. #jets #bengals

I was going to listen to the radio broadcast of the 2nd half, but I don’t want to miss out on #announcerfail.

What the hell was that Jets? And could the announcers have been less helpful? Oh nevermind. #announcerfail

How do Bears fans feel every time Benson busts out a great run?

What is up with the penalties? Terrible terrible call. #officiatingfail

My dad will confirm that I put the curse on that kick. And it worked! #jets

That was a good catch. But oh btw, Marvin Lewis, you are OUT OF CHALLENGES. #coachingfail

RT @dwag29: “The Jets… uh uh, Bengals can’t challenge’ – Tom Hammond. #announcerfail

Thomas Jones sighting! In the end zone! And if his knee was down? Well, we’ll never know.

Ooh, I see what you did there! RT @ChetRazzball: It’s not unusual to see T Jones score a TD

RT @dwag29: RT @grmeyer: #announcerfail The announcers of Jets/Bengals game are better suited for this venue: http://flic.kr/p/5KiuFm

RT @ChetRazzball: RT @NotJayCutler: I’d like to have a guy like Cedric Benson playing for the Bears.

Andre Caldwell should not be in the game. What is the medical staff thinking?

Great game plan and play calling by Schottenheimer. Brian, that is. #jets

Dad wanted to know if there was a moment of silence for Casey Johnson before the game. I don’t think so.

Oh, thanks to @stackmack, it appears that there was a moment of silence for Casey Johnson. Sad story.

Well @TheBigLead, you said it. This is the Jets. It is never over. #gack

Ok, Mark Sanchez, are you ready for your close-up?

This play calling has just been brilliant. Brian Schottenheimer!

My dad is pacing. And he’s not even a Jets fan. #tense

I put the hex on Graham again. And it worked again!!!!! #jets #bengals #kickerfail

Damn. Even Ochocinco is thinking, “I can make that kick.”

High fives all around here at Casa Rykoff. #jets

I went with my gut and it paid off. Well, actually Rex Ryan’s gut paid off. #jets

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Guidos, Guidettes and Whorebags, Oh My! It’s the Jersey Shore

Posted on December 4, 2009. Filed under: Tale of the Tweets, Television | Tags: , , , , , , |

Because I am apparently a sick, twisted glutton for punishment, I watched the two-hour premiere of MTV’s Jersey Shore tonight. God help me.

To say that it was like watching a train wreck would be like saying that the Titanic suffered just a small scratch.

Admittedly, I’ve been to the Jersey Shore only twice in my life, and Manasquan/Bayhead is NOT Seaside Heights. So, this was a whole new world for me (remember, I grew up in California). I sat literally slack-jawed through the first 10 minutes. I had never seen anything like this before. Men and women referring to themselves proudly as “guidos” and “guidettes”? What? Men who took more time getting ready to go out than even the highest of high maintenance women? I couldn’t believe my eyes. Hair gel, cologne, hairspray and tans everywhere.

The Guidos and Guidettes of MTV's Jersey Shore

Can you imagine what the casting notes were for this show? Seeking the kings and queens of guidos and guidettes for a reality show. Must have a nickname. And at least one of you must be named Vinny. And another one must refer to yourself in the third person. At all times. My mind is reeling.

After 10 minutes of this nightmare, I thought about giving up. But I am a trooper and believe in taking one for the team. So I stuck it out. And tweeted. And tweeted. And tweeted. I honestly think the tweeting made watching the show bearable. Knowing that I wasn’t alone watching this foreign world of guidos, guidettes and juiceheads gave me comfort. A sick, twisted form of comfort. Misery does love company.

Without further ado, here is the Jersey Shore Premiere: Tale of the Tweets

Who is watching #JerseyShore live at 10 p.m. ET? I’m watching for as long as I can stomach it.

I had no idea that guidos refer to themselve as guidos. And are proud of it. #jerseyshore #godhelpme

She actually called herself the “The Kim Kardashian of Staten Island.” Like it’s a good thing. #facepalm #jerseyshore

And there’s a new series called “Teen Moms.” I’m horrified for so many reasons I don’t even know where to start.

Huge gold cross chain AND ginormous tattooed cross on back? Yeah, we get it Ronnie. #JerseyShore

“I don’t have time for stupid bimbos.” Oh how I wish I were as strong as Sammi. #jerseyshore

RT @MAD_DENDOR: @amandarykoff #jerseyshore word of the day, “Whorebags”

OMG. The ink on Pauly D’s back is outrageous. Is that Italy or an italian flag? Or both? #jerseyshore

“All the whores…shut up.” Classic dialogue. #jerseyshore

The Situation does not freakin’ tweet. RT @Bankoff: Not very realistic, no one is Tweeting, not even The Situation. #JerseyShore

There’s a reason they got the impression you’re a crazy, sluty-ass girl, Snooki. #jerseyshore

@TheNateMundy “I’m a bartender. I do GREAT things.” #jerseyshore

“Dude. You’re a guidette.” #peptalksonjerseyshore #jerseyshore

RT @ErinMcCaffrey: “All the girls are like fish, we just throw out a line and see who bites” #jerseyshore

“My ideal man would be Italian, dark, muscles, juicehead, guido.” What the hell is a juicehead? #jerseyshore

Oh my god. Of course “juicehead” is “steroid user.” #idontspeakguidette #jerseyshore

“You’re the Queen of Guidettes. Not just a Guidette.” Still LMAO. #jerseyshore

“Pink eye is very contagious. I don’t know much about it, but I heard you can catch it just from the air.” Pauly D on #jerseyshore

RT @Stefmara: “It’s not a matter of when she’s going to hook up with me. It’s more about when I decide” #jerseyshore

And perhaps Teen Moms. RT @Stefmara: This show is the reason why many people should not procreate #jerseyshore

“I am a c*&k block. Um hm. Yeah. Not gonna lie.” #jerseyshore

“I will cut your hair while you’re sleeping.” #hitaguidowhereithurts #jerseyshore

In retrospect, I didn’t tweet enough about The Situation. He may require a separate blog post. When I’m ready to deal with The Situation properly.  Until then, god help me. And god help us all.

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#PodcampAZ 2009: Tale of the Tweets

Posted on November 18, 2009. Filed under: Social Media, Tale of the Tweets, Travel | Tags: , |

As you no doubt know by now, one of my main reasons for heading out to Phoenix this weekend wasn’t just to enjoy Cardinals’ tailgating and Arizona Fall League baseball, but to partake of PodcampAZ 2009. Want to know more about what a Podcamp is? I could explain it to you, but I’m lazy and the good people of PodcampAZ already did it for me. Just click here.

PodcampAZ 2009

I was going to put together a full overview of my day at PodcampAZ, but again, I’m feeling pretty lazy. And since I live-tweeted many of the sessions that day, I am going to rely on the Tale of the Tweets. If you’re interested in finding more Twitter chatter from both days, as well as links to presentations, just search #podcampaz.

Overall, I give it a big thumbs up. The content was compelling and engaging, and of course extremely on-point for me, as I embark on my next adventure. The only downside was having to choose between so many great presentations on so many topics I wanted to learn about! Blogging, podcasting, social media, tips, tricks, dos, donts, and everything in between. Guess I’ll have to come back next year.

I have to give some special shout-outs to some of the coolest, friendliest and warmest people I’ve met in a long time. Thanks to everybody who made me feel at home and welcomed me to Phoenix, but especially Tyler Hurst (my host), Katie Charland, Bubba, Jay Baer, Clintus McGintus, Ms Herr, Brian Shaler, Kevin Gawthrope (even though he’s a Red Sox fan) and countless others, including the organizers. Thank you thank you thank you.

Without further ado, let’s get to the PodcampAZ 2009 Tale of the Tweets:

Hello #podcampaz! Why must you start so early in the morning?

Thank you thank you thank you to whomever brought the magical mini pumpkin cupcakes to #podcampaz.

OH: “So is WordPress a website editor?” #podcampaz

Hey @dawkblitz, there’s a dude with a Dawkins Eagles jersey in @jaybaer‘s #podcampaz session.

Coolest. Business card. Ever. From @jaybaer #podcampaz http://post.ly/Cbu3

OH: “Oh yeah. I remember you. The taint!” #thingstakenoutofcontext #podcampaz

Agreed! RT @azbubba this session may not be the most informative, but it’s definitely the most fun! #podcampaz

Spotted @chuckreynolds riding in the bed of a black pickup truck. #podcampaz

Lunching with the Tempe Nerds. Yes, that’s a group here. Love it. #podcampaz

It’s so easy to stalk @brianshaler at #podcampaz

“If you build it, they will come.” To your site/community. Nice use of Field of Dreams by @brianshaler. #podcampaz

Me either! Panic! RT @azbubba social media question: I still don’t have a digg user account. How bad is that?

Personal branding lesson from @brianshaler: keep control over your image and brand. #podcampaz

Session morphed into awesome jokes about @brianshaler‘s Movember mustache. With sunglasses to complete the look. #podcampaz

Must. Have. Pillow. RT @azbubba because @brianshaler pimped the site, I made it relevant. http://bit.ly/13tN8G @chuckreynolds #podcampaz

Hey @throwboy, can I have a #podcampaz pillow? Pretty please? It would be great for my flight back to NYC.

It’s not about the tools, it’s about the community you build with the tools. And what you do with it. @gawthrok at #podcampaz

“Eat like a bird. Poop like an elephant. #channelingguykawasaki #podcampaz

I’d like to call out another outstanding presentation: Jay Baer’s 11 Must Dos for the Serious Blogger, which can be found here.

I must confess that I skipped Day 2 of PodcampAZ to go to the Arizona Cardinals game.  As Clintus said, I’m more of a sports fan than a geek. This is true. It’s a choice I don’t regret and my experiences at the game (particularly the insane tailgating) will be the subject of a yet-to-be-written blog post.  If you want to check out the photos of my experience at the Cardinals game, you can find them on Flickr.

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Phoenix WordCamp 2009: Tale of the Tweets #phxwc

Posted on November 13, 2009. Filed under: Social Media, Tale of the Tweets | Tags: , , , , |

If ever there was a day that needed – nay, demanded – a Tale of the Tweets, it was Phoenix WordCamp 2009.

What’s WordCamp? Only an all-day WordPress extravaganza! Picture 500 bloggers, wanna-be bloggers, vloggers, developers, programmers and WordPress enthusiasts gathered under a huge tent at the Arizona Grand Resort for all things WordPress.

Phoenix WordPress 2009

Some speakers were um, not so helpful. They shall remain nameless to protect the guilty. Some were entertaining. And some were awesome. You will undoubtedly be able to tell from the tweets which speakers were more (or less) awesome than others.

I was taking notes on my laptop and then I had the epiphany: why not share some of the highlights (and lowlights) on Twitter and then convert the whole day into an epic Tale of the Tweets? If you want to follow the entire Twitter stream for the day from everybody that was live-tweeting, search #phxwc.

My key takeaways from the day at WordCamp:

  • WordPress is freakin’ awesome and will someday rule the world
  • Be passionate about what you do
  • Be yourself and establish your voice
  • I do not know anything about coding or developing
  • The geek/tech/blog/business/marketing community in Phoenix is really really nice

Without further ado, I present the Phoenix WordCamp: Tale of the Tweets

Here’s what I’m doing today: Phoenix WordCamp. Watch the live stream at www.GoDaddy.com/WordCamp #phxwc

Question: how can you advise clients on blogs when you don’t have a blog yourself? #phxwc

I’ll be live-tweeting #phxwc, so move along if you’re not interested in any of this blogging/social media stuff.

First up is the keynote speaker: @Lorelleonwp. All about WordPress. She creates 1975 articles/year. #phxwc

Categories are the life blood of our blogs b/c they are the table of contents. #phxwc

Purpose of WordPress is about content and your voice. This isn’t news, but an important reminder. #phxwc

This is the year of original content. #phxwc

Today’s obvious statement: Learn to write to be read well. #phxwc

Sorry, but there there is no situation in which jeopardy music is appropriate. Especially at WordCamp. #phxwc

Ooh, @brianshaler is sitting a few people over from me. Hi Brian! #phxwc

Helpful hint to maximize search hits: Stop using pronouns. Start using nouns. #phxwc

If you want to get someone’s attention, show them something they’ve never seen before or show it in a way they’ve never seen before. #phxwc

Multimedia publishing powered by WordPress with @davemoyer. Go beyond the words with multimedia. #phxwc

RT @tdhurst Feels like we’re watching the presenters entertain themselves (via @katiecharland) #phxwc

To stand out, be outstanding. #phxwc

Use a plugin. Linking to download is soooo 1999. #phxwc

So WordPress is a content management system? And your site doesn’t have to look like a “blog”? #phxwc

Hey speaker guy, make sure your presentation doesn’t have spelling or grammatical errors. K. Thx. Bye. #phxwc

SEO keys: make proper tags. Title tags, description tags, keyword tags. #phxwc

Not going to lie. I am confused by this SEO presentation. Is it just me? #phxwc

Hello Phoenix WordCamp! #phxwc http://post.ly/CXCm

Let the record reflect that @katiecharland has excellent taste in computers and jewelry. Men? Not so sure.

Amen. RT @tdhurst: Cool panel by @photomatt, @chuckreynolds and @strebel. It’s like these guys know what they’re doing. #phxwc

New plugins are coming! WordPress is taking over the world! Bwaaahaaaa. #phxwc

Me too! RT @katiecharland: Must become self-hosted on wordpress today. I want all the things being talked about (and a bad ass theme) #phxwc

Always good to get a Skynet reference in. #wordpressistakingovertheworld #phxwc

Food. Must. Have. Food. #phxwc

My lunch bag didn’t have a cookie. I got a new lunch bag. #mmmcookie #phxwc

Hate me if you want to. This is where Phoenix WordCamp is. #phxwc http://post.ly/CXdT

I won this awesome t-shirt from @JimmyTraina. It’s perfect b/c I love Twitter giveaways and I hate the Red Sox! http://bit.ly/L1bsx

Oh god help they’re doing the wave at #phxwc. I do not do the wave. Anywhere. Ever.

WordPress is changing the world! If by “changing” you mean “taking over”. Then yes, WP is changing the world. #phxwc

WordPress can help you with personal branding? #thisisnotnews #phxwc

You do business with people you trust. Hey, I think @chrisbrogan @julien and @charleshgreen might have something to say about that. #phxwc

Talking about @garyvee as the guru of personal branding. #phxwc

Look for problems and provide a solution. #duh #phxwc

Wait. I can download WordPress? And it’s constantly changing? Thanks #phxwc!

Crowdsourcing. Leverage other talents. #phxwc

Wow. Over/under on number of tweets about crowdsourcing this presentation currently at 10. Who wants the over? #phxwc

Two kinds of people: WordPress experts and people who need a WordPress expert. #phxwc

So I could have stayed in NY this weekend for WordCamp NYC? What gives, @tdhurst? #phxwc

This one is way too smart! RT @tdhurst: I’d rather a preso be too smart to be understood than far too dumb to pay attention to. #phxwc

This is a great presentation by @vegasgeek on creating WP plug-ins. I just wish I understood it. #phxwc

Cool. @vegasgeek has a tattoo that says “Geek”, but doesn’t have one that says “WordPress”. #phxwc

Note: @vegasgeek responded: You totally should have added “yet” to the end of that tweet! #phxwc

This Merlin Mann dude is actually funny. Though enough with ripping off Dana Carvey’s grumpy old man. #phxwc

I feel so inadequate here using Twitter on the web and my blackberry. At least I have a black MacBook. #phxwc

http://twitpic.com/pe5g0 – Merlin Mann (@hotdogsladies) at Phoenix WordCamp. #phxwc

Words to live by: Liars don’t prosper. #phxwc

Personal publishing/having a blog in and of itself is not social media. We confuse personal publishing and social media at our peril. #phxwc

Listening to what’s being said, responding and changing. Now that’s social media. #phxwc

“Friend” is not a friend. It’s just a person with an icon. #phxwc

True social media is not natively scalable or proportional. #phxwc

Voice. With Howard Stern you know what you’re getting. Voice is key. #phxwc

You create an editorial voice every time you point someone somewhere else. #phxwc

The problem with expectations is that they get made regardless. You need to manage expectations. #phxwc

If you know who you are, you don’t have to sweat your brand. Your brand is you. #phxwc

You only need to manage your brand when you don’t know who you are. Or you’re not interesting. #phxwc [AMEN]

Here’s the outline from Merlin Mann’s presentation at #phxwc: http://www.kungfugrippe.com/

Whether you’re just starting out or doing this for a while: give more than you get. Help people. Participate. #phxwc

Listen. Look. Share. Learn. Be with real people. Meet them. Learn from them. #phxwc

Always make time for the people that are the center of what you do. “Friends” are not friends. #phxwc

Oh man I am so doing a Tale of the Tweets for #phxwc.

Don’t just follow the herd. Follow your instincts. Do it as well as you can as often as you can. If it doesn’t work, do something else. #phxwc

Up next: @iboughtamac talking Designing for WordPress. He is high energy. Yowza. #phxwc

Start with a basic WP theme. Get ahold of this stuff and just start playing with it. #thatswhatshesaid #phxwc

Blogs require lots of attention. They’re like a dog. #phxwc

Guy next to me keeps jostling his knee which causes the entire table to shake. Grrrr. #petpeeves

Next up: @Clintus on video blogging. I like Clintus McGintus. Though he is a total attention whore. His words. #phxwc

Ooh! Another @garyvee mention at #phxwc.

Whoa. @Clintus‘ site is http://idoitdigital.com. I thought at first it was http://idiotdigital.com. #phxwc

And that’s a wrap from #phxwc. I am in definite need of a drink. #ifonlyiwasntonantibiotics

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Tale of the Tweets: Yankees World Series Victory (and Birthday) Celebration Edition

Posted on November 6, 2009. Filed under: Baseball, Sports, Tale of the Tweets, Things I Love About NY, World Series, Yankees | Tags: , , |

Just because the World Series is over doesn’t mean we can’t bring back the Tale of the Tweets. I’ve pulled all the tweets from today’s Yankees parade and Victory Celebration at City Hall and put them into one nice post. See how easy and fun this is?  Enjoy.

One quick note: I didn’t actually see the parade. I had to fight my way through the insanity that was the parade crowds in order to get my ticket to the City Hall celebration. I thought I was going to die from overcrowding. No joke. It was a total and complete nightmare. Once I got into City Hall, it was all good. I staked out a great spot in the center but towards the back when I befriended the crew guys working the camera hoist. No, not in that way. Come on. And with my 10x zoom camera, I was able to take some great pictures, which you can find here.

All in all, an amazing way to celebrate the Yankees. And my birthday (did I mention it was my birthday?)

Without further ado, here is the Tale of the Tweets: Yankees World Series Victory (and Birthday) Celebration Edition

There are no words to describe the nightmare clusterf$*k that is downtown Manhattan right now. No. Words.

 

A parade on my birthday? Oh, New York, you shouldn’t have.

 

– At City Hall for Yankees Victory ceremony.

 

Cotton Eye Joe on PA system at City Hall. Really? Hasn’t he tortured us enough?

 

The crowd is getting restless here at City Hall. I Got A Feeling playing on pa now.

 

Really, New York, you didn’t have to go to so much trouble for little old me today.

 

Reggie, Yogi, Michael Kay, John and Suzyn all gathered on stage.

 

Chuck Schumer in the house. Shocker.

 

Rudy in the house. Even more shocking.

 

Not yet! But could happen. 🙂 RT @runner_23 @amandarykoff Did the crowd break out into “happy birthday” yet?

 

Kay congratulates Bloomberg on re-election. Crowd boos.

 

– Yankees on City Hall stage

 

Sergio Mitre gets a key to the city. And I am here to witness it.

 

Jay-Z took a picture with the trophy. And that’s a wrap from City Hall.

 

If only Jay-Z had sung Happy Birthday instead of Empire State of Mind. Otherwise, not a bad way to celebrate.

 

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Tale of the Tweets: World Series Championship (and Chris Meloni) Edition

Posted on November 5, 2009. Filed under: Baseball, Sports, Tale of the Tweets, Things I Love About NY, World Series, Yankees | Tags: , , , , , |

Happy. Exhausted. Hung over. Relieved. That’s how I feel right now as I put together the final 2009 installment of the Yankees Tale of the Tweets. Why is that? Oh, because the Yankees closed out the Phillies last night at the Stadium to win Championship #27.  The boys got to Pedro Martinez early and won thanks to outstanding pitching from Andy Pettitte, Damaso Marte (yes, really!) and the great Mariano Rivera and a series-record tying 6 RBI from MVP Hideki Matsui.

Requisite disclaimer: if you’re looking for real analysis and an actual game recap, please look elsewhere, including my friends at River Avenue Blues, This Purist Bleeds Pinstripes and Yankeeist.

We (@rebecca_glass @bkabak @schwartzslaw @joepawl @larry_koestler @bniche) gathered at Blondie’s on the Upper West Side for the third straight game, along with a ton of Yankees fans. Blondie’s had a good vibe working from the start (unlike Monday night), and the team took the lead early. As the game progressed, it looked like our boys were going to close this thing out in six games.

The crowd was fired up and lots of chants (“Der-ek Jeter”, “Let’s Go Yankees!” “Andy Pettitte”, “Hip Hip Jorge!”, “MVP! MVP!”, “Who’s Your Daddy?”) erupted at the bar throughout the game. And as usual, the Blondie’s DJ played all the Yankees songs, just as if you were at the Stadium: Empire State of Mind, YMCA, God Bless America, Take Me Out to the Ball Game, I Wanna Rock, Cotton Eye Joe (unfortunately), and Enter Sandman.

After Mariano locked up yet another World Series save (there are no words to describe Mariano), they put New York New York on repeat and we sang along until we couldn’t sing any more. (Note: pictures will be posted later. I had some technical difficulties with iPhoto and thought I might have lost the pictures, but they’re fine; I just couldn’t upload them).

Without further ado, I present the Tale of the Tweets: World Series Championship (and Chris Meloni) Edition:

Just a few people at the bar for the World Series http://post.ly/BdhT

OH: At least he got good wood on it. #thatswhatshesaid

Welcome back Hideki Matsui.

What's Japanese for "Daddy"?

There is a lone Phillies fan here. Why would you come to a Yankees bar? Seriously. He’s going to be abused all night.

Come on. We’ve got to be able to hit that. #thingsthatsounddirtybutreallyarent

I’m afraid to see what Evil Stacey tweeted after that A-Rod strikeout. (@gotsu_bb)

What’s Japanese for “daddy”?

Matsui needs a new nickname. “Chichi” is daddy in Japanese. #chichi

Who was the last DH to win World Series MVP? #twitterismygoogle

Chris Meloni just walked in to the bar. No joke.

Nice to see you Detective Stabler (photo courtesy Rebecca Glass)

And I just walked by Chris Meloni (not on purpose, I swear). He is, um, super hot. Wow.

And I just high-fived Chris Meloni. Who agreed with the Daily Show that Philly fans are the douchiest.

CBS in NY has a camera at Blondie’s to film the hoopla. We might be on tv later!

Chants of MVP at the bar for Matsui. #notashock

It is now time for the Hideki Matsui MVP-eanut M&Ms.

Witnesses to the Meloni high five: @rebecca_glass @bkabak @larry_koestler @joepawl @schwartzslaw @bniche.

On our feet at the bar for Andy Pettitte. #awesomeandy

Oh no! Meg is in twitter jail! RT @YankeeMegInPHL I’m in TWITTER JAIL!!!!!!

My favorite part of a night like this is the crazies that come out in NYC.

Damaso Marte. To sneeze or not to sneeze. That is the question.

Never been so happy to hear God Bless America. 6 more baby.

Buy 6 get 7th free! RT @bkabak We just got yet another pitcher of Brooklyn. This one was on the house. Oh yeah. Free beer.

Bar going nuts to Enter Sandman.

I am not ok with the defense of Brett Gardner. #understatementsoftheyear

Looks like a helluva game between the Lakers and Rockets tonight. #waytoosoontotalkaboutnba

Reunited - and it feels so good

And the bar plays Empire State of Mind. 3 more outs. #hfs

Start spreading the news. New York Yankees 2009 World Series champs.

Bar has champagne for everybody. #classact

Next up at the bar: New York State of Mind. Seems about right.

Post World Series victory beers with @bkabak @joepawl @larry_koestler = awesome.

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World Series Game 3: Tale of the (Trick or) Tweets

Posted on November 1, 2009. Filed under: Baseball, Sports, Tale of the Tweets, World Series, Yankees | Tags: , , , |

Once again, here are all my tweets from World Series Game 3 on Halloween night. I did not travel to Philadelphia (though many people thought I would make the easy trip down the turnpike).

Instead, I watched at Blondie’s on the Upper West Side with a great group of Yankee fans, including @rebecca_glass, @stefmara, @schwartzslaw, @bkabak, @larry_koestler, @emmaspan and @sarapepitone. If you want to see pictures from the evening, they’re up on Flickr. Nothing too incriminating. The most popular costume on this Halloween was “Yankee fan”.

I provide the same disclaimer on this recurring feature. This is not about a recap or analysis. If you’re looking for that, I commend you to many of the other Yankees blogs that can provide that, including This Purist Wears Pinstripes, River Avenue Blues (recap courtesy of Ben Kabak) and Yankeeist. I do this tweet recap more for myself to memorialize the “of the moment” thoughts, but you fine folks seem to enjoy it as well.

Freddy Sez

Freddy "Sez"

In terms of the game, it was a typical Yankees win. Down early, but gritty pitching from Andy after a rough start and home runs from A-Rod (his first World Series home run, not without controversy, of course), Swisher and Matsui, got us the lead. The great Mariano Rivera retired the last two Phillies, including Jimmy Rollins to end it. Oh, and the Yankees now have a 2-1 series lead.

Without further ado, I present World Series Game 3: Tale of the Tweets.

It’s a baseball watching Halloween at the bar http://post.ly/B919

Music at bar during rain delay: Empire State of Mind, Yankee Mambo, Baba O’Reilly, I Got a Feeling. #yankees

Damn straight. RT @sarapepitone @amandarykoff won’t let anyone drink yuengling since it’s from pa, @bkabak agrees

RT @bcollinsmn During rain delay, Fox is showing The Cleveland Show, the closest Cleveland is going to get to the World Series

More music during rain delay: I Wanna Rock, Welcome to the Jungle, NY NY (too soon), November Rain.

Want to see my Halloween costume? http://post.ly/B9Mj

Nice analysis from Captain Obvious RT @bkabak Pettitte’s missing his spots big time tonight. /obvious

It’s 10 pm. Do you know where Andy Pettitte’s curveball is?

Entire bar is chanting “Home run! Home run! Home run!”

So A-Rod has only hit 6 home runs this post season? What has he done for us lately?

Gee. Who could it be? RT @bkabak So what idiot decided to put a camera hanging over the field in play in fair territory anyway?

That was pretty freakin’ Awesome Andy.

Sacrifices must be made. No Yuengling during the World Series.

Damn. Cole Hamels folding like a cheap tent.

Bars are fun! RT @rebecca_glass That was amazing i need to watch games in bars more often

Nice work. RT @jessespector Last former WS MVP to give up RBI to pitcher in a WS: Whitey Ford, 1B by Ray Sadecki, G1, 1964.

The bar went absolutely nuts for Swisher. Mohawk Nation is strong!

YMCA playing now. Just like we’re at the Stadium. #loveit

Hey @jonahkeri, @bkabak says hi. We miss you at this tweetup. But we understand you have some other things going on.

You’re in good hands with Posada. #insurance #seewhatididthere

7th inning music at the bar: God Bless America, Take Me Out to the Ball Game, Glory Days.

Happy 8th Anniversary Mr. November.

STFU RT @SheFanJane Hey, Jimmy Rollins. Your crowd is how loud again?

Now playing: Cotton Eye Joe. Make of that what you will.

Damaso Marte is in and I’m not sneezing. Interesting.

Is there anything less fun than “fun size”? http://post.ly/BAFF

What? Cold? Raining? Miserable? Stay. It’s the World Series. RT @bigleaguestew Good amount of empty blue seats here at The Bank.

What was that about peanut M&Ms? Does Joe Buck read my tweets?

Now playing: Enter Sandman. But you probably knew that. [Note: excellent picture of Rebecca Glass playing air guitar, courtesy of @Stefmara]

Entire bar singing New York New York. I heart NY. [for video, courtesy of Rebecca Glass, click here]

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Tale of the Tweets: World Series Game 2

Posted on October 30, 2009. Filed under: Baseball, Sports, Tale of the Tweets, World Series, Yankees | Tags: , , |

Once again, here are all my tweets from World Series Game 2 at Yankee Stadium. Look, I do this for myself, but if you want to take a look, be my guest. Oh, in terms of the game, I’ll put together a brief recap later, but you can also check out this post from Rebecca Glass at This Purist Bleeds Pinstripes. (in which I’m mentioned a few times, ahem).  Bottom line: AJ dominated, Pedro was good but not good enough, Mariano was Mariano, Teixeira and Matsui homered, and the Yankees won 3-1. It was also my 8th win this season in a game following a loss.

Without further ado, I present the Tale of the Tweets: World Series Game 2.

Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your conductor. Let’s go Yankees.

Paul O’Neill throws out first pitch. Charlie Hayes delivers game ball. Yankees pulling out all the stops.

I am sitting directly behind home plate 400 level 3rd row. I can call balls and strikes from here.

Crowd alternating between Let’s Go Yankees, Derek Jeter and Who’s Your Daddy chants.

Holy cow Ibanez. I did not know he had that range. And he probably didn’t know either.

When was Pedro’s last appearance at the (old) Stadium? Game 7 2003 ALCS?

Thanks all for the Pedro info. Now let’s make him wish he’d never come back.

Mid-game change our luck tweet-up with @rebecca_glass and @bniche.

It worked!!!!!! Teixeira!!!!! Mid-game change our luck tweet-up with @rebecca_glass and @bniche.

Johnny Damon. Buzzkill.

Back at the seats for Matsui. It is all good. #yankees

Everybody in my section was on their feet for that last half inning. High fives all around. It was awesome. I love this place.

Oh man. Once again, we just went thermonuclear. (h/t @schwartzslaw)

I love Mariano Rivera. Can I just say that? Viva leverage! (@rebecca_glass)

Oh what a difference a day makes. Nobody leaving early.

On. Our. Feet.

The lucky shirt is dead. Long live the lucky shirt. Yeah baby. #yankees

Good things happen when I am at Game 2s started by AJ. Coincidence?

Yankee fan wearing a red jacket. Told him he needs to get a navy jacket for games. He laughed. And got the message.

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